April 14, 2010
MRI update: I went back to my orthopedic doctor last week to find out the results of the MRI on my right ankle. Once again I was presented with good and bad news. The good (great) news is that my ankle LOOKS fine and there is no damage to the joint or cartilage. This is a huge relief, of course. But then he told me that there is nothing he can do for me based on the results of the MRI. Tears sprang up in my eyes and began to roll down my face despite trying to control myself. How can there be nothing “wrong” when I’m in so much pain? I appreciate that he doesn’t want to do unnecessary surgery, yet I can’t understand how nobody can figure out how to fix my ankle after all of these years (the ankle problems started five years ago). So basically I left the office a crying mess wondering what to do next. Second, third, fourth opinions? Mayo Clinic again? It’s almost too exhausting to even think about much less go through. Back to the beginning, back to “square one.” All I want is to be able to walk normal again, or as normal as possible, with less pain.
In better news, I have rediscovered the joys of riding a bike and have established a goal of biking 3-4 miles a day around a small lake near my house. I went yesterday and Monday and it felt great, despite being a sweaty huffing-puffing wimp by the end of the ride both days. It’s raining right now but I still want to try to go before I work tonight. RAIN WILL NOT STOP ME! Nor will this disease, dammit.
I don’t know what I’m going to do about this ankle, but I’ll have to figure out something. I just can’t believe that there’s nothing that can be done.
April 3, 2010
Once again I can’t believe how long it’s been since I updated this thing. I am truly sorry, if there’s anybody out there missing me (hello? hello?). I’m still alive and unfortunately I still have arthritis and all of the joys and pains that go along with it.
So what’s new? After a seemingly failed synovectomy surgery on my right ankle three years ago, I basically had given up in frustration on the stubborn joint. Just recently I decided to take up the fight again and try to see if there’s anything else/new that can be done to help me. I’m so tired of having to limit myself and being forced to sacrifice little things that I desperately want and enjoy, such as taking a simple WALK, and being able to travel. I can’t stand to be on my feet for very long due to this constantly swollen and painful ankle. I don’t understand why it has been such a mystery and struggle to figure out what’s wrong with it and to fix it. So, I have started the “process” again of doctor appointments, X-rays, fighting with my insurance company, and having to hand over most of my paychecks to pay the bills. I just had another MRI yesterday and will find out the results in time for my doctor appointment Tuesday. I fear that another surgery is on the horizon, but what other choice do I have? I need to get my life back. Soon.
Despite all of this complaining, I do have some wonderful news that I saved for last. I have been PREDNISONE-FREE for almost two months! You have no idea how happy this makes me. Well, maybe you do. I’m extremely thankful for this and I hope it can continue for a long time.
OK, that’s all for now. I’m also very happy to be back writing on this blog. I have some exciting and positive things coming up soon with the Arthritis Foundation, but I’ll save that news for another time.
EOB = Explanation of Benefits = how much money I have to shell out for medical bills
PANF = Patient Access Network Foundation – I just found out that they are currently out of funds for rheumatoid arthritis patients, so now I’m on the waitlist. This is bad since I have an upcoming remicade infusion at the end of the month and have no way to pay for the out-of-pocket portion ($900).